You Can't Make This Stuff Up

So last week, I had this nice post planned. Where I talked about how crazy difficult it's been since Joe has been TDY. Complete with stories of screaming babies and toddlers, and attempts to get out of the house. To sum that up: we're surviving. It's been tough, but we're doing just fine. Hallelujah!

But just about the time I finished that post, this happened:

Let me give you the only-slighty detailed version.

Monday was pretty dull, actually. Just some rain and we stayed home. 

Tuesday, I had a friend from church come over to watch the girls while I ran out to get my ID card scanned for this fancy gate system they've started on post (Anyone else's duty station starting this? Seems kinda dumb to me...), and then I went for some last minute (pre-apocalyptic) groceries. By the time I was heading home, it was already starting to sleet. I suppose that should have been a sign.

Wednesday we woke up to a little bit of ice and snow. I had assumed the worst would have happened overnight, and that if we'd made it that far things would be hunky-dory. Oh, was I ever wrong. It continued to sleet and snow throughout the day. Around noon the power started flickering. Over and over again. Sometimes a couple times in an hour; sometimes it would flicker and then not again for a couple hours. Before I put Charlotte to bed, I tossed her in the bath and put her in warm PJs. Not 30 minutes after I put her to bed the power flickered about 5 times before finally going out. Cue panic attack. I called and texted several people to see if maybe we could stay the night with them, but none who were close had power, either. And there I was. Alone. In a powerless, heatless house, in freezing weather, with a toddler and a newborn. GREAT. I put an extra blanket on Charlotte before I went to bed. Thankfully the house was still fairly warm at that point. I bundled Millie up as much as I could without freaking myself out. I even attempted to put her in bed with me, but she wouldn't sleep. (Of course. The ONE TIME I'm okay with bed-sharing.... SIGH.) 

Thursday came around and, while we survived the night, the house was cold. Too cold for my babies, for sure. Basically I spent the morning trying to keep Charlotte under blankets, and Millie from being cold. And I made calls and texts to see who we could stay with until our power came back. But the problem was that someone would have to come get me... Our driveway is far to steep...and even if the ice hadn't been there, a tree was blocking my car. UGH. So around noon, a friend's husband came to get me, the girls, and all our crap. (By the way I packed you'd think we were leaving for a week. Why do kids need so much stuff?!) I found it funny (ironically so) that this man who I'd met maybe once was walking into my incredibly disastrous house, loading my stuff, and my kids in his car for us to stay at his house. Not even that, but HE had offered to his wife (my friend) to come get us. Needless to say I'm a fan. ;-) Oh, and he even calmed down Millie while I finished packing. I mean, seriously. Anyway. We were at their house until around dinner, when another friend who lives less than 5 minutes away told me her power was back and we could stay with her and her kids. So, we packed up again. :P 

Friday rolls around...still no power at my house. The local news was reporting that the power company I use was estimating Saturday at midnight for everyone in the area to have power again. And when I heard that, I pretty much gave up all hope for going home. Meanwhile, her husband comes home from a TDY...with flowers. Oh, right. Valentine's Day. GREAT. Poor Charlotte ran to the door with their kids, because, you know...daddy's home. My poor sweet girl misses her daddy so much. So basically, my heart hurts for her - we're not home, daddy's not home, her little world is so wrong. Thankfully she's a true military kid and rolls with the punches. She had a pretty good time playing with their boys, and all of their toys. Haha:) After lunch I had her husband drop me off at my house so I could check the power, and get my car since all the ice and snow was gone by this point. (And the tree was no longer leaning over my driveway.) Still. No. Power. I had to get some gripe water for Millie, so I also got a cute little stuffed puppy for Charlotte and some chocolate for myself. Gotta survive the day somehow, right?! Finally, around 6, we got our power back. We had dinner at her house, and then I packed up the kids and headed home. WOO! Oh, but the day wasn't over yet... 

I got to talk to Joe one last time before he had to turn his phone in for a couple weeks. It was nice, but definitely not long enough. I changed into PJs, sat down on the bed to plug in my phone....and I heard a loud rumble. Not totally unusual since I live pretty close to railroad tracks. So, I assumed it was a slow, heavy train coming through. But then I didn't hear a horn. And then I felt it under my feet. And then my walls and windows were shaking, and I found myself terrified to move. You know, because the ground under me was shaking.  (Link to the local news story about it, just in case you think I made it up.)

So let's run this down real quick. In less than one week, I experienced: an ice storm (first one since I was a teenager), a 2 day power outage in which I stayed in other people's homes, loss of all the food in my fridge and freezer, the frying of my computer's hard drive thanks to the power outage, and a freaking earthquake. 

Just about the time I thought Murphy was finished with us, Charlotte woke up with a cold on Monday. At this point, I don't think any mishap will surprise me. I am SO DONE with Joe being gone. And I'm even more ticked at the Army for this. (Because, YES. It is their fault. He was NOT supposed to go to NTC this round.)

Is it March yet?!?!?!

It's Baaaaaaaack!

It meaning baby fever and Murphy. Yes, both in one day. 


First, it was the pregnancy announcements on Facebook. You really just gotta love Facebook sometimes, right? Great for keeping you in touch with people and even better about hitting you in the stomach with feelings. I hate to say it, but this deployment has made me into a jealous - sometimes bitter - woman. I try so hard not to act that way, but the truth is I'm jealous. 


How could I not be, though? Deployment has taken my everything. Everything being my husband, best friend and other half - not to mention even the chance to have a baby. Is it really any wonder that I'm jealous? Jealous of women who have their husbands home and will never have to wonder what a night without them would be like. Jealous of women whose husbands may be out of town...but are sleeping safe and soundly in a cushy hotel room. Jealous of women who have the chance {even if it doesn't happen} to have a baby. Jealous of women who are pregnant. 


My head knows that it's impossible for me to even think about being pregnant right now. Telling my heart that is a different story. My heart doesn't care that there's no way I could get pregnant. It still wants a baby - a pregnancy. My head knows my husband has a job to do in the sandbox and he won't be home until he's home. My heart doesn't understand that. It doesn't understand that he has to work - that he has to be gone to do his job. It wants to spend time with him, to hold him and to tell him I love him in person.


As if all these feelings weren't enough to deal with for one day, Murphy decided it was a good time to play tricks on me. I worked out {hard} hoping that I could shove those feelings aside for a while. You know, work out my anger. I almost succeeded until I went to get in the shower. There was a spider on the floor. Luckily I had the Raid handy, so I sprayed it. No biggie. I opened the shower to turn on the water, and there it was. Another, bigger, spider. It scared me, I panicked and accidentally shoved the shower curtain back so hard that the rod fell down. Scaring me yet again. Once I sprayed that one, I saw another spider on the wall behind the toilet. At this point I screamed and yelled, "Oh my God!!!!" I sprayed that one and all but ran out of the bathroom. Enter tears. Many, many tears. Not only had my heart been attacked, but the rest of me as well. All I could think was "Why isn't my husband here?!?!!" as I cried and leaned my head up against the wall. I tried to call my mom in hopes of regaining control over myself, but she didn't answer. 


Apparently, God wanted me to deal with this on my own and realize that what the Enemy likes to do the most is beat you while you're down. And dang it if he isn't really good at his job. Slowly, I started to dispose of the dead spiders {except for the one I couldn't find} and got in the shower. Of course, every other second I was looking around checking for more spiders. Thankfully, my day got better...but I'm still not fully recovered. I'm still worried about finding spiders in the bathroom {or anywhere else, really} and my heart still really wants a baby...and my husband back. {Though not in that order.} I'm so glad we don't have much longer to go until he comes home. My heart can't take much more separation.