I made brownies and took them to our neighbours.*
We've lived across the street from these people for the past year, and I barely know their names. We wave when we're outside, and we may even have a short conversation, but that's it. It's really not unusual, and most of the time I'm okay with that kind of distance. The problem is that I've been feeling extra lonely and...distant lately. I'll be the first to admit that I'm an introvert with hermit tendencies. This is most of the reason why being a one car family hasn't bothered me all that much. I digress. Knowing my introverted, hermit ways, I basically have to force myself to make friends. Somehow, it wasn't all that difficult in Hawaii. I guess it was because I made most of my friends through blogging, and then the rest just sort of fell in my lap because of the Army. We had fantastic neighbors - one couple who brought me dinners while Joe was in WLC and I was 9 months pregnant with Charlotte, and another who took photos of our family and watched our house/car while we were gone over Christmas.
Much to my dismay, there aren't many military spouse bloggers in these parts. Or maybe they just don't advertise. :P Don't get me wrong, I do know people here. I just haven't found that friend here yet. You know, the one who you can call up and say "wanna come over and hang out?" The one who doesn't care what your house looks like or when you last showered, and helps themselves to whatever is in the kitchen. The one who will even invite themselves over - or offer to babysit. Or whatever.
I tossed around the idea of leading a mom Bible study thing over the summer, but that honestly seems a bit overwhelming. I've got so many other things to keep up with... I don't think adding another activity/responsibility is going to help me out. I thought about doing several other things before I suddenly remembered a sermon series our church did recently - on being a good neighbor.
I realized that there's a family across the street with a baby about a month older than Millie. The mother of that baby is home pretty much all the time {except they have 2 vehicles #jealousy}. There's a family next door to them that has a little boy maybe a year or so older than Charlotte. Suddenly, I realized that there is a potential friend living across the street. Why do I keep looking for community - for friends - when there are people all around me?!
Maybe it's the distance that made me forget. It's not like living on post, where you can make fast friends because you already have something in common - the military. We shared walls and garages with our neighbors in Hawaii. It's pretty hard not to make friends with your neighbors in those situations. But here? It's a little bit different. And now that I have kiddos, I feel like it's even harder to make friends. Because naps, and feedings, and tantrums, and life.
I don't know if those brownies will kickstart a friendship, but at least I can say I did something. I stopped feeling sorry for myself long enough to bake some goodies, slap a note on some tupperware, walk across the street, and pray to find a friend.
*I know that's the UK spelling, but the American version just doesn't look right to me at the moment! Also, I really hope you have that song stuck in your head now. ("Could you be my - won't you be my neighbour?") Charlotte has watched Daniel Tiger like crazy lately and it's on repeat in my head. You're welcome.
